I have begun to shop in earnest for maternity clothes as my little belly begins to make it impossible to fit into my regular clothes (excluding my favorite grey sweats, of course - those endure the whole 40 weeks- but one does occasionally need to leave the house and look semi-presentable). So I turned once again to an old favorite from my previous pregnancy - the classiest of all maternity clothing: IsabellaOliver. I discovered it entirely by accident when I was pregnant with Brooklyn and absolutely loved the simplicity of their design, the classic elegance and simple colors. It isn't cheap, but you can buy some good basics and they last past your pregnancy. In short, it SPOKE to me.

Well, this year, they have equally amazing stuff, plus I got an email that they just had their Spring/Summer 08 preview. So, I pulled it up and watched the little email video. And there was an interview with founders of the company, Vanessa and Baukjen. At the end of the little clip, Baukjen was encouraging us pregnant shoppers to enjoy this time of shapeliness and curves and to take care of ourselves. Or, rather, she said, quite intimately, "take care of yourself." For some reason, her simple missive made tears immediately spring to my eyes!

I find myself being oddly sensitive to the most bizarre things lately. Commercials make me tear up, and clearly, well-meaning wishes from perfect strangers over the internet.

If you are interested (not in crying, but in clothing), check out their website: www.isabellaoliver.com

When Brooklyn woke up from her nap the other day, the first words out of her mouth as she saw me walking toward her crib were - "HERE'S MOMMY!!!!!" Sort of like the old intro to the Johnny Carson show. It made me laugh out loud! But the words that followed that really made me laugh out loud. "How bout some POPCORN!?" As though she'd been dreaming about and longing for popcorn and couldn't go a moment longer without some.

And today, we were in the bathroom blowing our noses together, and I asked her if she would like to take a shower. She casually leaned against the wall and said, "Yeah...I guess." Again, spontaneous laughter from her mommy. I immediately called Kyle to share the anecdote.

I never cease to be amazed at the random things she picks up and then casually throws into the conversation.

We met our friends Julia & Drew and their daughter, Lake, at the park this week for some playtime despite the cold temperatures. If anything, I felt that was a reason to play outside! Drew was prepared with his camera and sent me these pictures of our kiddos playing together. Lake is Brooklyn's best buddy! They have totally different personalities which is what makes them fun to watch, I think.

As the baby in me gets bigger, so is my belly. I memorialized the 12 week point with a shot of the tummy. Brooklyn gave my belly some kisses and then decided to do a little comparison with her own tummy! Mine's definitely bigger.

Here's a little picture of what the baby in my tummy looks like right about now.

This video makes me laugh out loud and cringe at the same time. She's obviously torn between terror and joy! I think she decides to go with joy at the last minute when she flings her hands over her head - just as we do when we zoom over those annoying neighborhood speed bumps. But the preceding grimace and attempt to shrink into her jacket makes me want to stop the swing immediately and squeeze her to me!

You can see the resolve in her - I will enjoy this. And then, she does! I think she has the Dennis thrill-seeking gene in her yet. She'll be riding roller coasters as soon as she clears that pesky little line. And I've seen that look of terror on the most devout roller coaster rider, and it always ends with hands thrown into the air!

While I went to a baby shower this morning, Kyle and B took to the Park. Just a mere walk from our house is Idlewild Park. Isn't that a great name for a park? Love it.

The park also has a tennis court which was in use this morning, and Kyle said Brooklyn kept yelling to the two gentleman playing, "Good Job!" and "Come slide with me!" I am not sure they ever realized they were being encouraged by an almost 2 year old who really does like tennis, but I was proud of her spirit!

Brooklyn also did some swinging. Do you remember that look of terror when your stomach first dipped and soared along with the motion of the swing and you weren't sure you hated it or loved it?

I happened to drive by the park on my way home from the shower and saw my two favorite people playing in the park, so I joined them! Just in time to see Brooklyn waltz up to a 3 year old little girl - a complete stranger - and tell her, "HI! Come SWING!" The girl, Haley, was not nearly as outgoing as Brooklyn and hid her face in her grandmother's sweater.

Kyle and I challenged each other to a game of Yahtzee the other day, and Brooklyn took it upon herself to be our official dice shaker. She got pretty into it.

"Hey! How are you? Good!"
"Mommy! Come here!"
"Mommy! Where are you?"
"Where Darby go?"
"Ready go gym?"
"Yahtzee!!!" (video to follow in a day or so)
"Oh No! I make mess!"
"Where pacie? Better go find it!"
"More samwich!"
When we fake cry, she caresses our face and says, "'sokay, daddy, don't cry"
"Come back here!"
"I sorry, Mommy"
"Ready go ustairs?"
"Bekfast! Food!"
"Kiss Booboo!"
"We're HOME!"
"I sorry!" (when she hurts herself)
"Watch Veg Tales!"
"Watch a movie, watch!"
"I hold you" (when she wants to be held)
"Hold this" (to hold something or give it to you)
"Don't do that!"
"Goodness!" (instead of Gosh which we do not say)
"Pease!! Thank You! Welcome!"

She also sings Jesus Loves Me as well as Tomorrow from Annie. She's a veritable fount of vocabulary.

I realize that the topics of my blog jump all over the place, and that's because this blog tracks my thoughts which also jump all over the place. Hopefully you won't get dizzy if you are keeping track.

I have to say that within the last several days, I have been amazed to find my body with a mind of its own. I almost feel as though I'm just along for the ride, waiting to see what will happen next. Waiting with dread...cause I know that what comes next is a bigger belly, more pounds reflected on the scale, and a general loss of svelteness that I work so hard to achieve. For someone who loves to work out, lift weights, run and see the results of that hard work, pregnancy is really hard for me. I'm just being honest here. I love being pregnant. Don't get me wrong. But I feel like for these months, my body goes completely in the wrong direction!!!! I feel like I'm swelling up like a marshmallow man! And I'm only a third of the way there!

I have heard that things move quicker the second time around, and I'm finding that to be true! I know my uterus is getting bigger cause I see my stomach pooching out. While part of it is my growing uterus, the other part is just my stomach and intestines being pushed up and out! So I take one bite of food and I swear my stomach pooches out an inch. I also find my body responding in foreign ways to food. I eat something harmless and have gas for the rest of the day. And while we Dennis' are known for our "quirky" digestive systems, pregnancy takes that up a notch for me. Factor in constipation on top of the usual thrills, plus a hefty dose of GAS on top of the poochy belly, and I find myself wearing only sweatpants. My poor husband. He is so kind and tells me he still thinks I'm beautiful, but I wonder how he can believe it right now?

And then there's the boob situation. I'm being candid here, so buzz off if I'm getting too personal. Ok, so when I got pregnant with Brooklyn, immediately my breasts were so sore that I felt like I'd bench press'd three people. And it was this way for months, on top of which I grew a couple cup sizes. Fun for some, but not for me! I'd prefer smaller, rather than larger! So, you start feeling like a porn star, except not so sexy cause of your growing belly. Well, this time around, I had just finished weaning Brooklyn, and my breasts didn't feel sore at all. Or bigger. If anything, they were as small as they'd ever been and I was so excited! Until three days ago. I woke up one morning to feel some unexpected soreness (flashback to being preggo with B), and I kid you not, an hour later, they were slightly bigger. Kyle concurred. Two days later (today), I swear they are even bigger and heavier! No wonder I'm gaining weight! It's all coming together!

So, I'm finally starting to feel less nauseous (praise God!) but suddenly find myself feeling fat, bloated and sore! Ah well. I remind myself that pregnancy is a miraculous thing. That my blood volume is doubling which accounts for my gasping at the top of our stairs. (How is it that I can run for 30 minutes and feel fine, but panting as I walk up our stairs? Mind boggling.) One of these days I'll look pregnant and not just like I ate too much over the holidays...

In the meantime, I'll try not to complain too much as my body does its own thing and takes me along for the ride. :) Maybe I'll start glowing on top of everything else!

As Kyle and I drove home from church today, we had on the forefront of our minds a fabulous sermon which we had just heard preached by Fareed Tulbah, the youngest and newest pastor of our church. He had related a story which triggered a conversation between Kyle and me about something we're learning as we go: parenting.

The story Fareed mentioned involved a parent saying he was sorry, that he wished he'd done things differently when Fareed was younger. Fareed said that he responded to his dad by saying, Dad, I know you did the best you could, and I forgive you. Those words, "I'm sorry", especially coming from a parent, require such humility.

Kyle and I started thinking about what an integral part of parenting humility is. For starters, any parent who pretends he has everything all together is more than just pretending. He's lying to himself, and worse, his kids. And kids are not stupid. They are the first to detect liars.

I am convinced, based on my observations of parents over the years (including my own), that parenting is a process of growth, change and humility. You learn as you go, making mistakes and hopefully, getting some things right. I was fortunate to have two parents who, I believe, parented with humility.

They made it clear to us from day one that they were being raised up along with us kids, and that they did not have all the answers. They could be wrong. They admitted it when they were wrong. Now, they were very firm on many things, and backed up many of these with the Scriptures, but I can remember many conversations with my dad where he would remind me, "Ashley, we're gonna make mistakes. We're learning as we go. God is teaching us things one day at a time, and you need to be patient with us." For some reason, just knowing that my mom and dad weren't pretending to us kids to be the end of all answers and rightness, I respected them more. I saw them struggle to make wise decisions in regards to their children. I saw them struggle to resolve issues with each other - saw them praying together for wisdom and guidance, knelt with them to include us in those prayers. And while, at the time, I just absorbed it, I process it now, as a new parent, as actions guided by humility.

They had been given responsibilities by the Lord to raise their 7 children and that responsibility did not come with clearcut rules. The Bible for guidance, open lines of communication through prayer, godly older couples to whom they turned for advice, fellow couples walking the same rough path...doing the best they could.

It strikes me as so critical to remain humble in this journey of parenting. To not pretend to have all the answers. For one thing, every child is different and requires a different touch. For another thing, God is constantly teaching us new things and if we're not humble, we'll not be open to learning new lessons and passing those on to our children. I'm not saying don't be the parent. Do be the parent. But don't be afraid to tell your children you were wrong. And be able to say you were sorry. If our children learn by our behavior, then shouldn't they see us willing to humble ourselves and admit when we were wrong? It isn't a sign of weakness to admit you were wrong. If you fail to do so, and your kids KNOW you were wrong, you only succeed in building a wall between you and your children. They recognize hypocrisy and begin filing those things away in their mind as ok to do when a parent. This is not God's plan for us.

I fully set forth that I am learning as I go and am nothing but humble in regards to what I know and what I don't know. But I pray that I will parent with humility. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord and He will lift you up. Humility and fear of the Lord lead to riches, honor and life. So, as I understand it, successful parenting is impossible without a humble heart. Just a thought.