Tales from Goshen: June 2012

Sweet Puppy

7:46 PM

Is there anything, ANYTHING, I ask you, cuter than a puppy?

The correct answer is NO, and I'll tell you why.

I know you're thinking, but a baby is cuter! Well....if you're being honest with yourself, you'll realize that is just not always true. Babies are small. They are sweet. And often, they turn out to be darn cute humans. But they don't always start out cute.

Now dogs, on the other hand...they may grow up to be the ugliest thing ever, but somehow, they are all cute as puppies.

But in the humble opinion of this writer, the cutest puppy ever would have to be the Golden Retriever.

Yes, I am unabashedly partial to Goldens, and yes, they also grow up to be gorgeous adults, but there is something about their blonde fuzziness and floppy ears and big brown eyes as little puppies that is just heart-wrenchingly cute.

So what's gotten into me, you ask? Well, as you know if you read this blog, my precious Golden, Bailey, my soul dog for almost 11 years, passed away this past December. Given the bond I had with Bailey, that Kyle and I had with her, it has taken some time to emotionally be prepared to love that deeply again.

But it's time. After six months, this girl is dying to have a dog in the house again. And not just any dog - another Golden. In typical fashion, I did my research. And prayed. And narrowed it down to one kennel, in particular, that had just the type of Golden I was looking for. One just like Bailey.

I arrived at this kennel by pulling out Bailey's pedigree and researching her parents and grandparents. Which led me to Karagold Golden Retrievers and the breeder, Karen Brady. Bailey's dad, Maguire, was a Karagold Golden. And as I browsed the Karagold website, I kept coming across pictures of dogs that looked remarkably like Bailey.

To you, a Golden may look just like every other Golden, but that's an over-generalization. When you start really looking, you can see family resemblances just like in humans. And it was evident that the line of Goldens Karen has produced has some definite family traits, and that was exactly what I was hoping for.

I don't believe in coincidence, so I conclude that God prompted Kyle and I to get serious about our search at just the right time, because when I started to look seriously at Karagold, turns out they had 2 litters pending. And after submitting an application, I was amazed to hear from Karen almost immediately! Something about our application spoke to her and we will be getting a puppy from her in a few weeks!

If you want to see pictures of the puppies (it's the Bumper/Boomer litter), check out her website.

I do, just about daily. The pictures of those little furballs is a healing salve to this girl who just can't be without a Golden. I need them like my lungs need oxygen.

The Lesson of Art

7:00 AM

This past Friday I began my Drawing and Painting the Figure class. It's a ten week class that meets on Friday nights from 5:30 - 9:30. We use live models, which is a first for me, and quite challenging!

This class excites me and scares the pants off me for several reasons:

1) I've never been taught how to draw quite like I need to now draw,

2) I have yet to actually use oil paints,

3) My teacher is someone whose art I particularly admire and who also is a friend,

4) I am scared I'm not gonna be any good at it and,

5) I really really really want to learn and to be good at this.

Our first class, the teacher wasn't actually there - he had two of his serious students loosely instruct us. I am hoping for some more specific instructions as we go along. I felt like I was tossed in the deep end and told to dog-paddle.

But I really enjoyed working with a live model, as it made me feel like a true artist!

And here's the thing I'm going to confess to you.

I feel like a fraud. I'm not really an artist. I'm a person who longs to be able to paint like those who most deeply move and inspire me. And I realize that the painters I most admire spent their entire lives learning and perfecting their crafts - many of them choosing their careers over marriage. So I know that one doesn't just start painting the paintings I see in my head. You have to learn how to draw, how to block a figure (something I am just now learning), how to measure proportions and angles, how to see people as lines of movement and not just gestural objects.

And that's all before I ever dip my brand Winsor Newton hog's hair brushes into my brand new oil paints and see how this thing works. I'm scared to death. And determined like nobody's business. And terrified. Oh, wait, I already said that.

Pursuing your dream, testing your mettle, trying to cultivate a little bud of a talent that you might have had years ago, but which you coldly and methodically smothered in pursuit of more analytical talents...well, it's not a small or easy thing. I could fail. I could be horrible!

And I may be. But I tell you this, my friends, it won't be for lack of effort or desire.

Not only did this past weekend mark the first of my 10 weeks of class, my daughter Brooklyn also had the first of her own 10 weeks of art classes. Her class is more of an Introduction to Art. She'll be dabbling in clay, as you see above, paint, pastels, drawing, pottery... it will give her an opportunity to see what kind of medium she enjoys the most. And, in keeping with our family values, it will further develop her Creativity!

As she took her class Saturday morning from 9-10:30, Kyle and I took August and Dorien for a breakfast of totally unhealthy pastries at Boulevard Bread Company. And afterwards, we crossed the parking lot to explore this interesting little garden space. The meandering glass path you see above was lovely, but not something I'd want to accidentally fall into!

This enormous sculpted head appeared to be casually sunning himself.

This area was perfect for running around willy-nilly. So we did.

I am so proud of my city for creating this space full of beautiful flowers, unique gardens, sculptures and beauty. It makes me proud.

A Cuppa

Life 2:41 PM

Although it seems as though the Dog Days of summer are already here at the end of June (judging by our recent temperature of 105), occasionally, I still reach for a little cup of espresso mid-afternoon to give me a boost.

My favorite little gadget for making an espresso is my little Bialetti Moka pot. Not only does it make a darn fabulous espresso, but the little logo man makes me smile.

The size Moka pot I have makes a little serving of espresso for one person and it is out of this world! I feel very European (Italian, to be precise) every time I unscrew the little base, fill it with water, drop in the coffee compartment, put in the required scoops of coffee, re-screw the top and bottom together and position it, oh-so-carefully, over my oven's lowest flame setting. In about a minute, I see a hiss of steam emerging from the spout and a promising gurgling sound as the water is drawn upwards through the grounds and espresso magically appears.

Interesting aside here - for some reason I prefer to sweeten my espresso with brown sugar instead of white. Don't know why, but it makes it slightly more decadent to me.

But on some days, I need something with a little bit less of a kick. Something like hot tea.

Oh yes, I'm still every bit as much of a hot tea lover as always. Again, even during the heat of summer. Call me crazy!

And while I do usually go with tea bags (Earl Grey or PG Tips) as opposed to loose tea, I like to do things as correct as possible. In order to make sure I was doing what was properly British in regards to my afternoon tea, I even found a little You-Tube video on making a proper "cuppa."

The proper procedure for making a "cuppa" involves bringing water to boil in my kettle, then pouring some boiling water into the ceramic tea pot to "hot the pot." (The purpose of this, as far as I can tell, is to prevent a cold pot from sucking heat away from its purpose which is, first and foremost, to brew the perfect tea). After the pot has been "hotted" (tee hee), you dump out that hot water and then place into the teapot either a) scoops of loose tea or b) tea bags.

As a general rule of thumb, if you're going with loose tea, you use a spoonful of tea per person you'll be serving and one for the pot. I always find that step kind of endearing. (I would like to thank Lynnie here for the gift of her mother's teapot to me. I use it and think of her!)

Same general idea with the tea bags - one per person plus the pot. Although, I confess that depending on the type of tea bag and how strong it tends to turn out, I'll use just one bag.

You let the tea steep the required number of minutes. If you're using milk, you put a little in the bottom of your teacup before you pour in the tea. And then sugar it after the tea has been poured.

Milk goes with sugar.

Honey goes with lemon.

And then, you sip and savor and find that no matter how stressful your day has been, it calms down a bit. And if you really do it right, you pull out your prettiest teacup and saucer and enjoy your tea even more cause it's now not just a soothing process, but a beautiful event.

And if you happen to be me, then you have a pretty decent collection of lovely little teacups that you can use so that each and every teatime experience is lovely in its own unique way.

So, although it makes me break out into a sweat sometimes when it's hotter than hot outside, I still find taking the time to drink some hot tea makes me find beauty amid the ashes. Particularly useful when your area of the country feels not unlike a blazing furnace.

Perfecting

Faith 1:59 PM

Yet again, I find myself awestruck at the nature of God's word.

I continue along in the study of James and it seems every day, this book with which I consider myself wholly familiar, as I have memorized it and poured over it lovingly, reveals new facets to me. As though I never knew it before.

And this is the nature of a book written by God. Words whispered by the Creator of the Universe, the Inventor of Humanity, the Author of Humanity's Salvation into the ears and hearts of flesh and blood who wrote those words faithfully down on paper. Words which have lingered protected and strangely new and fresh despite the thousands and millions of seconds that have passed since the original ink dried on the page.

The nature of those words is that they are supernatural. God cannot breathe something without it becoming something amazing and beyond our understanding. And breathe He did, our Scriptures into existence. And supernatural they truly are.

Mysterious, deeper than they seem to be, new and revelatory, connected and entwined from Old Testament to New Testament, from histories to prophecies, poetry and admonition, testimonies and true stories...I will never cease to marvel as long as I live.

I have been a Christ-follower since I was a little girl - age 5, to be precise. And I have spent much of my life studying and digging and seeking to know more of the God I love through the words He left me. And from one day to the next, the same familiar passage can reveal layer after layer, depth after depth, truly piercing my soul and always captivating me.

James 1:19 says "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning."

Literally, every good thing in our lives is from God. Not from a happy coincidence. Not from a karmic kudos. Not self-generated or naturally occurring. FROM GOD.

And here's where this just GOT me. The word "perfect" used by James is the word teleios. The expanded definition of teleios is "that which has achieved or reached its goal, objective, purpose."

I quote Beth Moore here: "Out of God's astounding grace, a very imperfect person can still receive a delightfully perfect gift precisely because it's perfect for her. God's gifts are given with goals. They're perfect because they're perfecting. They don't just give today. They give toward every tomorrow."

Think of something good in your life that you'd consider a gift. Now think of something really big, a really special gift. Got it pictured? Now, ask yourself if it's possible that such a gift is a perfecting gift - something that continues to transform you - perfect you - move you closer to the goal and objective God has designed for you.

When doing this study the other day, I immediately thought of the most amazing miracle that has ever happened to me and Kyle - the miracle of the enormous, unexpected raise that Kyle received, out of the blue, almost 6 years ago. Brooklyn was about 7 months old and I was working while she was in daycare and it was eating me alive. I desperately wanted to stay home with her - a feeling I found bizarre considering that not so long ago, I hadn't ever wanted children, much less to be a stay at home mom. Long story short, having just moved into our current home, it was impossible for me to quit my job. Kyle's salary was nowhere close to what we would need to cover expenses. We needed a miracle.

We got one. Unexpectedly, mind-blowingly, a bonafide miracle. God prompted Kyle's fabulous boss to suddenly and "spontaneously" reassess Kyle's value to the company and adjust his compensation accordingly. It was the kind of news that brought Kyle and I to our knees sobbing in praise and thanksgiving before this incredibly gracious gift-giving God we serve.

It was a perfect gift. It was a perfecting gift.

That gift allowed me to quit my job and stay home and be a mommy full-time to my precious daughter. And now the two little boys with whom we've subsequently been blessed. Gifted with, shall we say?

And I will say, unequivocally, that every moment spent as a full-time mother and wife, God has used to perfect me. Not that I am perfect, obviously - I am daily being transformed more and more into the image He desires for me; the woman He intends for me to be; I am working towards His goal for me, His objective, His masterpiece of me. I am being perfected daily as a result of that perfect gift.

Is that not stinkin awesome?????

I have further given this thought and realized, ok, my husband - another perfect and perfecting gift. My children - oh yeah. Precious and perfect and DEFINITELY used by God to perfect me as well as just give me joy every day.

I am so overwhelmed by this God of mine. So blown away that He would be so generous to me. To all who love Him and seek Him and follow Him. And so grateful that He rewards our quests to know Him more deeply by revealing deeper and deeper facets of Himself.

Messy, Sweet Life

4:16 PM

One of the best things about staying at home with my children is that it gives me a little more time to contemplate things about life. For one thing, it's rarely neat and tidy. Have you noticed that?

Unless you live in a really isolated location, there is a fair amount of human interaction required. And we humans are tricky. Messy. Problematic. Difficult to manage. Unpredictable. Unkind at times. Generous at others. Sweet. Not so sweet. Loving. Hateful. Open. Closed. Involved. Indifferent. An open book. A locked box.

I seem to be surrounded with potentially sticky situations right now. All involving people. Which puts me directly in a place where I frequently find myself, actually. And that's in conversation with God, asking for wisdom.

I'm currently studying the book of James and just the other day, the lesson I completed was so relevant as to make me look up and expect to see Jesus Christ, in the flesh, sitting on the chair across from me with his eyebrows raised. As if to say, "I'm for real, you know. Not only do I hear your prayers, I am as good as my word. When you ask for wisdom, I will give it to you."

There are no fewer than 5 specific things I am seriously seeking wisdom on. What do I mean by wisdom, exactly? Well, I'll tell you. You know when you have knowledge floating around your head and it's doing you no good because you don't know how to apply it to dealing with a particular situation? Well, wisdom is divine intervention that helps your knowledge align up to take practical steps which will result in glorifying God. I say "divine intervention" because without God's help, we will just sit there and puzzle over the facts endlessly, still no closer to knowing how to handle something. Or we could blunder forward doing what seems right but actually isn't. God tells us that wisdom is something we can ask Him for. Which means it isn't something we have in and of ourselves.

We can gain knowledge on our own. We can learn and study and absorb facts and even nuances of human behavior and emotion. But there is a definitive spiritual component that we only get when we ask God for it.

And the interesting thing is that we are assured of getting it when we ask for it. We are supposed to ask in a spirit of confidence, though, because if we ask for it in a wavering, doubtful spirit, it tells God that we don't really believe that He'll give it to us. Which is clearly a sign of a larger lack of confidence in God's word.

I particularly like that we're told to ask for wisdom and that God will give it to us liberally and without reproach. Liberally. That's exactly what I'm hoping for. A healthy dose. No scant measurements for me please. Lots and lots of wisdom, please!

Because as sticky and messy and yes, lovely, as this life is--I definitely need wisdom.

Beach Vacation - Part 3

kids 2:00 PM

The thing about taking your camera on vacation is that you tend to take pictures. And you tend to take lots of pictures if you are a) my husband or b) my sister-in-law, Lauren. If you're me, then, well, not so much. Fortunately I am able to rely on the diligence of the aforementioned two.

What that leaves me with then are still more pictures to share with you.

Yes, we are back in town and no longer relaxing on those lovely white beaches, but just looking once more at the pictures makes me feel like I COULD be there if I walked down a hall and looked out a window. Nevermind that all I see out my window right now is my neighbor's roof and the big green and yellow recycle bin.

The day I cooked my meal, I cooked all day, then desperately needed some air. I went for a run on the beach, barefoot and then ended up with huge blisters on 4 of my toes. Learned a very valuable lesson. Running on the beaches is pretty for pictures, but painful on feet.

Munch munch munch

My meal's appetizer: Bruschetta...

And a white bean spread bruschetta

Dessert: homemade chocolate chip cookie ice cream sandwiches. They either had vanilla, mint chocolate chip or toffee crunch ice cream. Yum!

Avery and August have a special bond.

Avery, August, Merrick and Brooklyn...

In the evenings, the wind could sometimes GUST through the place. Kyle was eating on the back deck one time and had his plate literally fly right off the table.

Dorien didn't seem to mind all that much.