Three weeks of school have passed already in my household. 

And I took part in a group coaching session (via Skype) by Renee Tougas for homeschooling children ages 5-8. It was awesome and I'll tell you more about it later! 

We're still adjusting to our school routine, but I have already noticed that if we miss a day or our routine is altered because of appointments or whatever, my kids kind of wig out. They like having school as part of their daily routine. 

Even today, we had the pleasure of one of my best friends come over with her two children--let me insert here how valuable and precious time with your dear girlfriends is-- and so I had planned to skip school today. Friday's are easy days anyway. Well, after her kids left and it was time to eat lunch and then take naps (or so I thought), my kids were begging to do school! So we did a little math and that made them happy. Could have been a ploy to delay naps, but ah well. 

Now, we're getting ready to head to our Farm for the weekend. The whole extended group of us all go down for Labor Day and Memorial Day. It's a growing group. And this weekend will be the first time since my entire clan has inhabited the Farm that we're actually having to spread out into two houses. One of my great-uncles recently sold his plot of "Farm" property to my parents, complete with its 3 bedroom house. So, the great expansion has begun.

Renee, our Rwandan, will be coming with us, and the kids are thrilled. He spent the summer back home in Rwanda and we haven't seen him in ages. He loves the Farm as much as we do! 

I'm bringing some books and some knitting and intend to relax thoroughly. I may even try to teach myself to crochet while I'm down there. 

I hope you take advantage of this long weekend and enjoy yourself immensely! 

I'll see you when we get back!

Birthdays are such tricky things. They come with expectations, whether you consciously attribute any expectations to them or not. Such as...as a general rule, you really want your birthday to be a good day! 

I mean, on the most simplistic level, that's what you're hoping for. A good day. If we're honest, let's go out there and say, we are truly hoping for a REALLY good day.

However, birthdays are also just regular days. They fall somewhere in the middle or beginning or end of a week full of 7 other days and stuff happens in days that may or may not be really good. It may just be another day. 

If you're looking into your future and planning things that may or may not occur on your birthday, I would recommend that you NOT schedule a vet appointment on your birthday and then haul your three kids plus your 22 pound puppy there all on your own. Cause it might happen that you feel a little stressed out after doing so. Cause you might also just happen to be at the critical stage in your puppy's growth where you can't risk exposing her to Parvo, so you have to carry her the whole time you're at the vet to make sure she doesn't get exposed to something. Which means your 3 kids are very possibly frolicking around in a waiting room that is just plain filthy with dog hair and germs and who knows what else. Not to mention that your youngest son's nose is draining snot at an alarming pace and pooling on his upper lip, turning into a snotty glue attracting and bonding with all the dog hair flying around. What this means is that your baby has a dog-hair mustache. Eww.

Since my birthday falls on a school day this year, I came home from the stressful vet trip and had to jump into our school day. Granted, Fridays are our least busy day, but it's still something we have to do and it can be stressful. Particularly when Dorien decides he's had it with everyone taking the seats he wants to sit in and he just throws himself against you and wails incessantly for 20 minutes while you're just hoping for a small window in which to wrap up this week's math lesson! 

Today also is the last night of my 10 week painting class and I sort of said I might bring cookies since it's our last week and also my birthday. What was I thinking? I must be nuts. I am looking forward to some painting time, though, so that is good birthday stuff. It's the obligatory cookie bake that I am now regretting. Kyle said, Ash, just don't mess with it! Yes, Kyle, that would be ok, but I am trustworthy. I said I would do it. Hm. Conundrum.

I'm also 35 today. Which means I'm halfway to 70. Trust me, it sounds older than it feels. I feel great! And as Kyle pointed out to me the other day - his 35th year was his best year yet. This is encouraging! Still....35...

In good news, I went to the dermatologist yesterday because I had a suspicious mole. Not that it was suspicious of ME, although it might have been. Mostly, I was suspicious about it. A few weeks ago, it suddenly got irritated looking and red around it and just odd. It is right in the line of my bra edge and definitely in a spot where it could get irritated, but it just happened fast and it worried me. The good news is that my little nevus is benign. Did you know nevus is the medical term for mole? Isn't it a funny word? If I ever have a pet mole of the animal variety, I'm naming it Nevus. 

But back to today. I will say that despite some typical day frustrations, there was one shining moment this morning that I wish I could have freeze-framed and stretched out to cover this whole day from start to finish. It was that good. As the kids and I were driving to the vet, I turned on the radio and one of my all time favorite songs was just beginning. Have you ever seen Pretty in Pink? Another personal favorite.  The very last song of the movie where Andie (Molly Ringwald) follows her "richie" boyfriend Blaine (Andrew McCarthy) out to his car in the middle of prom. He's just told her loves her, in all his fervent, super-serious, "this is high school and my parents don't approve but hang it all I love you" sort of way and Andie is torn because she wants to believe him, but she's been burned. And then Duckie (Jon Cryer), her best friend and side-kick who's also secretly in love with Andie, reluctantly tells her that Blaine came to prom all alone (which means he really does love her). At this, Andie runs after Blaine and they meet in the dark parking lot, with the moonlight and parking lot lights reflecting off the rain-slicked pavement. Just two teenagers in love. And the worlds greatest song cascades around them as they kiss...

Imagine this song playing (loudly) in the car and Brooklyn and August in their carseats rocking out. Oh yeah. Banging pretend drums, wailing into pretend microphones. Then, the following priceless dialogue...

Brooklyn - "Mom! This is the best song I've ever heard!" 

August - "Mom! This is the best song I've ever SEEN!"

Dorien - "Momma! Momma! Mommyyyy!!!"

Brooklyn - "I LOVE this song!"

August - "I love this song so much!"

Brooklyn - "This is the best day of my life!!"

And that, folks, accompanied by a great soundtrack is what does make a really great birthday. So listen and let this song make YOUR day...

If You Leave (by OMD)

Just in time, after weeks of endlessly hot days and not a drop of rain, there is a reprieve.

The heat backs off a bit. It may still be in the high 90's, but at least it isn't 112. In the evenings, in the shaded parts of my yard, it's downright pleasant. In the middle of the night, it could even be considered slightly cool. There has been rain. Blessed, blessed rain. One tiny minor power outage, but even that wasn't so bad because it wasn't unbearably hot outside while our a/c's blissfully rested.

Just this morning, there were three consecutive storm cells that blasted my neighborhood with "deadly lightning," ferocious winds and plenty of rain. 

I know it was deadly because as I squinted at my iphone Accuweather app at 2am to determine the severity of the storm, the Severe Thunderstorm Warning told me there would be deadly lightning. Oh goody.

Fortunately, it wasn't deadly to us and our trees dug their roots in firm and stayed upright and the ground opened up its mouth and drank thirstily. In spite of the nonstop ominous thunderclaps, my children stayed asleep. 

And woke this morning to start back to school.  We're in year 2 of homeschooling here on Goshen, and I have to admit, I'm pretty excited. The kids are too. 

Brooklyn is starting 1st grade, although she's doing a Language Arts program for 2nd graders. She's actually reading on a 7th grade level. Crazy, huh?

And August will be doing the same kind of kindergarten things Brooklyn did last year. He's only just turned 4, so please don't think I'm pushing him...I just know from last year that he wants to be in the thick of things. And rather than making stuff up for him to do off the top of my head (which I'm no good at), I went ahead and ordered a Handwriting book, his own math workbooks and the rest he'll just do with Brooklyn. 

Last year, he was constantly asking for "activities" to do. This year, he'll have some! He loves math and he really likes handwriting, believe it or not. He's my perfectionist. And independent. When there are things he's supposed to trace or copy, it bugs him that he can't do it all from scratch. It's fun seeing the differences in the personalities of my children. 

I learned last year, after following the order in Sonlight's instructor guides to a T, that it might be easier to come up with a different order. For instance, the guide takes this order: Bible, History/Geography, Read Alouds, Math, Language Arts: spelling, copywork, handwriting, creative writing, reading practice and then Science. I found it difficult to channel their early morning energy into a good read-aloud time. And they were not as focused as I wanted them to be for their math time. I knew something would need to be different.

At the suggestion of some notes in the curriculum, we started with Bible, then went straight to math and then did Read-alouds last, just after lunch and right before naps. That worked perfectly! 

Dorien was still a little bit of a wild card. He had his good and bad moments. 

Good: playing quietly by himself and looking at library books and talking to himself while the kids worked on their stuff...eating his bananas and raisins peacefully during morning snack time...

Bad: Screaming NO! NO! and trying to push Brooklyn and August off their chairs while they did their handwriting...eating the erasers off our pencils...bonking Singer on the head with his sippy cup while she gnawed innocently on her bone beside us...turning our math addition activity into a kamikaze free-for-all...Yelling MommaMommaMomma at the top of his lungs while I try to do anything other than pay 100% attention to him.

It'll all work out.  

In the meantime, I'm so grateful I have the opportunity to teach my kiddos and be with them all day and see them learn and figure things out and hear Brooklyn reading just fabulously with enthusiasm and the proper tone, inflection and everything...to hear them ask good questions about things and think about why things work the way they do and wonder out loud what "injustice" means and what a runt is and hear them laugh out loud at the thought of "Wilbur" being a beautiful name. Life is good.

Those two words so perfectly describe the last week.

Particularly Saturday and Sunday.

My sister-in-law, Beth, and my brother Michael asked me months ago when they realized they were pregnant with their first baby, if I would act as their doula. I was so very honored by their request. There is very little that I find more enjoyment in than pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding. Just call those things my Trifecta of Happiness.

And to share in that experience with two people who I dearly dearly love - it doesn't get much more special than that. 

Beth had decided she wanted to plan for a natural delivery and since she knew I was a huge advocate of the Bradley method, she and Michael borrowed all my Bradley books and educated themselves. And they really did - she read so many of the books I recommended and thought through some really good questions, and determined that the conventional "medically managed" delivery was not what they wanted.

One really cool thing that happened through this process is that mid-way through her pregnancy it became clear that her OB was really not on board with natural childbirth. In fact, one of my midwife/L&D nurse friends, highly recommended Beth switch doctors if her desire was truly for a natural delivery. Upon hearing this, Beth switched OB's to Cornerstone Clinic - where there are plenty of doctors who really do fully support natural childbirth. This move, to me, indicated a strength of conviction, and I was immediately convinced this was going to be a good experience for them.

Beth was due August 7, although none of us thought she would make it that far because beginning July 27, her body began showing signs of early labor. During the last week, there were about 3 times we thought labor was imminent. We even spent Friday afternoon at the hospital walking, only to go home. She experienced on and off mild contractions and managed to dilate to a 7 without doing any hard work. It's pretty much the dream way to have a baby. Needless to say, there wasn't a moment this past week when I didn't have my phone handy and babysitters lined up ready to spring over in case I needed run to the hospital suddenly. And since she was hanging out at a 7, it would definitely be a run to the hospital. 

If you're wondering what my job as a doula is, I'll tell you. A doula is a labor assistant. My job is to mother the mother. Be her advocate, her voice, help make sure the decisions that are made during the delivery are those she would want to be made, coach her through contractions, anticipate her needs, suggest different ways to labor, help her manage the whole process of labor and delivery, make sure her wishes are communicated to the hospital staff and adhered to, help her with breastfeeding and the immediate transition after the baby is born, help keep them from being bombarded with visitors and making sure they get their special time, answer questions on an ongoing basis, etc. Essentially, I was going to be to her what my midwife team was to me. And then some.

Saturday morning, August 4, is when my doula services were called into action. I was awoken at 8:02am by a call from Michael who said Beth was having contractions that were definitely more serious. I immediately took the world's fastest shower and said, I'm coming over! At 8:20, as I zoomed over there, Beth said to me over the phone, "well, I really don't know, Ashley, if we need to go just yet." "Uh, yes, Beth," I said, "we do." And as soon as I saw her face, I had no doubts. She had serious written all over her.

I love having good friends who are also L&D nurses because a phone call ensured we had a room with a tub and a natural friendly nurse. We got to the hospital in record time thanks to some speedy driving by Michael and were in a room by 9.  We had nurses who left us alone and let us do our thing and an even better Doctor, who - and I say this as highest praise - was like a midwife. I wanted to kiss him for his role in letting Beth have the delivery she desired. 

At 1:14pm, Beth delivered a baby girl - Aden Eliza. 

8 lbs, 7 oz; 21 1/4 inches long

And I have to say, from 9 to 1:14, it was truly exquisite. 

I had been nervous about how I'd do when the moment came to coach Beth, but there was a calm, easy, connected vibe between Beth, Michael and myself and it just flowed. I felt so in tune to everything Beth was experiencing that it's like I relived all three of my births at once with her. It enabled me to know just how to coach her, how to encourage her, what to say, how to say it, what to do and when to do them. I know the Lord was also present in that room with us. It was beautiful. If you've only experienced an epidural birth, I really wish you could be present at a birth like this one just to SEE the difference. Or experience one yourself. It's night and day. 

Even Beth said all the way through, it's totally bearable. It's manageable. The worst part was afterwards when they gave her some medicine to control bleeding and it made her feel really really sick. 

Without giving you details that aren't mine to share, I will simply say it was one absolutely amazing, beautiful, exquisite birth. I am bonded closer to both Beth and Michael forever. Not to mention their precious daughter whose very entrance into the world I was there to see. What a privilege and blessing.

 Then, after one very long day and late night, I found myself so spent on Sunday that I woke up only to go back to sleep from 10:30 to 3:30. A heck of a Sunday nap. That was bizarre. It was bizarre how I can look back over the last 10 days and feel that it was all wrapped up in the birth of my newest niece. And how much that was ok. How bizarre it is that something like labor involves such strange time warps. How time curls up and stretches out and zings back and you feel lost and scattered and amazed and tired and spent and utterly outside yourself. But at the same time, it's exquisite. That's the week I've had. And I wouldn't change a thing. 

In April, my family began a 3 month trial of a nutritarian diet.  Basically, a plant-based diet, largely dairy-free and primarily meat-free. We switched from skim milk to soy milk. (We tried almond milk, but it was too sweet for the kids).  

Kyle and I were inspired to undertake this after reading lots of compelling information, including these books:

Disease Proof Your Child: Feeding Kids Right

by Dr. Joel Fuhrman

Super Immunity: The Essential Nutrition Guide for Boosting your Body's Defenses...

by Dr. Joel Fuhrman

Eat to Live

by Dr. Joel Fuhrman

Cholesterol Protection for Life

by Dr. Joel Fuhrman

I have also since watched Forks Over Knives, a documentary which basically reinforced what we'd read in other places.

Our 3 month trial ended in July, but we have decided to continue eating this way.  Kyle and I lost some pounds, felt SO much lighter and cleaner, and more importantly, can find no downside to this way of eating.

We've also been extremely healthy and energetic, but all those things aside, just knowing that we are filling our bodies with vital nutrients instead of packing our systems full of gunk that has the potential to cause numerous cancers, heart disease, weight problems, diabetes, and so on and so forth is enough.

Especially for our kids.  And you may wonder if this means our kids will actually eat this way. And the answer is "yes, they will."  My rule before all meals is "Don't say you don't like something until you've tasted it." And every single time something may not have LOOKED like something they'd eat, once they tasted it, they always cleaned their plate. 

We do still use eggs occasionally. And we have yet to fully eliminate white sugar from our diet, but we have severely limited our use of it. And yes, this means lots less baking on my part. Although it's interesting that since I've stopped baking so much, the hold that the addictive combo of Butter/Sugar had over me seems to have lessened. I still occasionally want chocolate chip cookies and I will make them. But overall, I've found easier, healthier ways to satisfy my sweet tooth.

And thankfully, through a few like-minded women out there who happen to be raising their families using nutritarian lifestyles, and blog about it, I get all kinds of encouragement and reinforcement and even more important - recipes!

I have talked before about FIMBY...she's been immensely helpful in our journey. I recently purchased an e-book she wrote all about using salads as your main meals and how to create whole food salad dressing. I HIGHLY recommend that book, even if you're not following a plant-based diet.  Click on the link to her blog if you're interested in her e-book. 

I've also found lots of other blogs through hers, including this one, Kidoing, as well as this one who have given me inspiration for healthy cooking!  I guess it's like any other thing, once you start focusing on something, your eyes suddenly begin to notice all the other people out there who share your passions and interests. And praise God for that! 

As an example, I used a recipe from Kidoing this morning to make some seriously awesome pancakes. They're called Peanut Butter and Banana Hotcakes and you can find the recipe here.

These pancakes used whole wheat flour, no eggs, no sugar, no dairy...and my kids scarfed them DOWN like nobody's business. That's my goal, folks. Healthy food and happy kids.

I also recently made some Peanut Butter Cookies using this recipe. And I'll admit, I was skeptical...no eggs, no sugar, no flour...how could these possibly taste good? Trust me. Another huge success. And the interesting thing about these is that you can eat them uncooked or cooked. Kyle prefers them cooked, but I find the kids and I don't have a preference. They're just yummy! 

I enjoy cooking new things. I rarely repeat something with any degree of regularity unless I'm super short on time or energy and it's a Sunday night. In that case, breakfast always sounds good. But for the most part, I like trying new things and I am happy to say that's been able to continue since I've found all these great websites! 

Even if you don't think your family could go dairy-free or meat-free, I doubt any of us would argue that we couldn't put more veggies and fruits in our diet.  So start there and maybe see if you could make some other switches. Eliminate sodas and foods that you know you shouldn't eat anyway...cut out processed foods that you regularly give your kids. Pay attention to ingredients. Be mindful of what you purchase. Avoid those middle aisles of the grocery store. Start with one veg meal per week and see how that goes. It's definitely a process to shift your eating this way, just as it's a process to form a lifelong habit of working out and maintaining a level of fitness.  Or even tithing or having a regular prayer time or quiet time with the Lord.  And it may not matter all that much to you...food may just be food. 

And if that's the case, I challenge you to reconsider your stance on that. It's kinda silly.

It may seem crazy to you to eat (or not eat) so drastically. But hey, one man's crazy is another person's sane. I just made that up. But it seems true.

Good luck with your food decisions! 

I am giggling, even as I write the title to this post. Helpless giggles.

Have you heard of the Comfortisse Bra? It's advertised on TV. In this house, we've heard of it. Why? Because, in her own words, Brooklyn is "Curious about this bra." 

And how does she even KNOW about this bra? Well, that's a funny story. Turns out that one day this past weekend, I really can't remember which day, Kyle and I were napping upstairs, as were the kids.  Except that Brooklyn wasn't. And Kyle had left the TV on downstairs because he was watching soccer or the Olympics or something. 

And the fact that the TV was on at all is a strange occurrence in this house. We never watch normal TV. We don't have cable and barely get the basic channels, even with our elaborate rabbit-ear rig that is supposed to let us keep an eye on the Olympics currently going on.

So at some point, Brooklyn wanders downstairs to find the TV on and apparently, an infomercial in progress.  She was mesmerized. This is a girl who takes things very seriously and who never ever watches TV, who has no real idea what a commercial is, much less an infomercial.  This is a girl who is so interested in childbirth that she reads, literally READS, all my prenatal books on childbirth, some of which are quite graphic and honest. She is without a doubt the most knowledgeable 6 year on the logistics of having babies. I relay that to illustrate the seriousness she is capable of. Of her focus and determination.

But back to my story...

Kyle is awakened by a loudly whispering Brooklyn who is very earnest about something. As the fog of sleep lifts from him and he realizes her loud whispering is certain to wake up me and Dorien, he leads her downstairs where she proceeds to tell him the following:

"Daddy, there is a bra that is better than the one we have right now!

It's the Comfortisse Bra and it's on sale right now for $59.95. We can only order it on the phone, so we need to do it now. It's so much more comfortable than the bra we have now."

She was dead serious. And very concerned that we were missing out on a prime opportunity to upgrade in the bra department.

Kyle almost lost it. It became clear that we needed to do some on-the-spot instruction about advertising. Ironically, Kyle works in advertising.

Several days have passed and the Comfortisse Bra continues to be a topic of conversation in this house. Brooklyn still believes it must be extremely comfortable, as she says "the straps don't dig into your shoulders, there is no discomfort on your back, AND it comes in several beautiful colors". My daughter is parroting, VERBATIM, this infomercial. The more I question her about it, the more she remembers. 

We've talked about the difficulties of buying a bra online (or over the phone) without being able to try them on...about how it's probably not REALLY the greatest bra in the world, because those are very grand statements...and that people will tell you all kinds of things because they want your money - they're trying to sell you something. 

It's clear we've got some work to do on that front. No pun intended.