Short Cuts

4:40 PM

This is a very touchy subject in my family. Well, not in the me and Kyle and kids version of family, but if you ask my mom, she'll clam up and refuse to talk about it. So here's the thing. I love short hair. Pixie cuts, actually. I had one for YEARS and then, because I crave and need frequent change, I decided to grow my hair out long again. This was a process of some years...maybe five.  

I had achieved the longest hair I'd possibly ever had. It was crazy thick. And post-Wilder's birth, right around his five month mark, it started falling out like mad. This is totally normal, and I expected it, but I just hadn't had this quantity of hair in a long time, so we're talking massive handfuls during showers. Massive. I created epic "hair walls" every time I shampooed my hair, and frankly, it was taking forever to wash my hair because I had to pick so much hair out of my fingers when I scrubbed my head. I would also wake up in the morning and there would be hair all over my sheets. Wilder sleeps with me, and there would be hair all over him. It was really just gross, people.

And yes, it looked pretty occasionally. It had developed some curls, actually. (Pregnancy does interesting things to hair.) But to really work long hair and make it look good, you have to be willing it. Fix it. Style it. And I do not have time for that. I never dry my hair, which isn't a bad thing, but 75% of the time, after it dried, it would look horrible and I would end up going to work out or run or something, and I'd just whip it into a ponytail anyway. The few times I wore it down, it would drive me crazy - wind would whip it into my face and eyes, it is so HOT, and then Wilder started grabbing it with his little hands and pulling as hard as he could. Enough to bring tears to my eyes. And definite tears to his when I managed to extricate his fingers from his new favorite plaything.

But as you see, every picture of me (minus the two "just woken up" selfies above) show me in a ponytail. 

I get that people have strong opinions about things. My mom and some of my brothers have extremely strong opinions on hair. On MY hair. Well, that's all well and good for them, but I've never let it affect my choices. I am the one who has to live with it, and it had gotten to the point where I just felt ugly. And who needs that added to your daily stuff? 

It had also gotten so long and thick that when I ran, the ponytail gave me a headache. The realities of long, thick's not all pinterest glamour. 

So, towards the end of May, I reached the end of my tolerance. I made an appointment with a new hair stylist (a referral from a friend with super short hair) and took the train to Evanston to chop it all off.  Lest you worry my husband was upset about this - he's my biggest advocate for the short-hair version of me. He's been after me for months to chop it all off.

So I did.

Without a second of hesitation or regret.
I was reminded of the movie 500 Days of Summer...the narrator is talking about one of the main characters, Summer, and he says this..."Since the disintegration of her parent's marriage she'd only loved two things. The first was her long dark hair. The second was how easily she could cut it off and not feel a thing."

That described my feelings exactly.

I walked out of Art + Science salon lighter and happier.

It was a return to a former era of me.


Bear in mind these pictures are me sans make-up or anything. I am so not "styled" by any means. 
I rarely wear make-up, so natural is pretty much what you get. Crows feet, anyone? Gulp. 

I love it.  Kyle loves it. Wilder grinned hugely when he saw me, even though I was afraid he wouldn't recognize me! 
It makes working out, showering, fixing it, styling it (Bumble & Bumble's Sumo Clay) a cinch.  

Even if I just run my fingers through it and go, it's better than a ponytail. 
It's funny because to my new friends in Chicago who'd never seen me with a pixie, it was a total transformation. A completely different version of me, which was really fun. 
They now say it fits me much better, and they love it. 
Kyle is crazy about showers are super more "hair walls" more tiny hands ripping out more strands of hair on everything. 

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